Sarah’s Seduction, by Lora Leigh

Sarah's seduction

Grade: C-

Doing it at: 13%

Catnip: All in the Family, Threesomes, Fivesomes, Light Orgies, Mysterious Stalker, This Shit Is Bananas, WTF, Butt Stuff; Aftercare, #TeamAnal

Shame Scale: Red Hot Burning Shame

Fantasy Cast: Josh Hartnett x 2, Anne Hathaway, Matt Dillon, Christina Ricci

What do we taste like?: Like nectar. Like the sweetest honeyed drug.

Book Description:

Book 2 in the Men of August series

On a hot summer night six years before, Brock August showed Sarah Tate a passion that would nearly destroy her. But fear and innocence drove her from his arms and into a marriage she neither wanted nor found happiness in. Now Sarah is free and she wants that night she lost. One night, a few stolen hours to know the heat and passion of the man she never forgot. But Brock has other plans in mind. A secret, a passion, a desire his brothers share. A desire Sarah will be unable to deny. That is, if she can escape the dark designs of the stalker intent on destroying the August men.


This is the sequel to Marly’s Choice, the bananas romance between three brothers, and Marly, their “ward,” of sorts. I won’t say I was dying to read this book, but I was looking forward to seeing how much crazier this story would get when the men added another woman to their harem. Some back story: The August brothers – Cade (the oldest), and twins Sam and Brock, suffered some sort of traumatic abuse when they were older teens. As a result, they’ve found that the only way they can express their love for each other, and reinforce their bond as brothers, is to share their girlfriends with each other. In Marly’s choice, Cade finally took Marly as his woman, but she takes care of all his brothers as well. Sometimes all of them at the same time. The Family that plays together, stays together, and all that.

Also, I want to mention that I read most of this book on an airplane, sitting in between my husband and a stranger, with large print. I’m kind of proud of myself for that, because it definitely took some balls.

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Maldeamores, by Mara White

Maldeamores

Grade: B

Doing it at: 80 %

Catnip: Kissing Cousins; Butt Stuff; #TeamAnal; Threesomes; Sharks and Jets

Shame Scale: It’s a love story about first cousins, so… pretty high shame. But – it reads like a real book, so you can cut yourself some slack.

Fantasy Cast: Jay Hernandez, Selena Gomez

Book Description:

Belén: I’ve loved Luciano ever since I can remember, desired him before I even knew what it meant. He’s always been the only man in my life—my constant protector, and his rejection only intensifies my need. 

Luciano: I’ve never known a love more fierce than the one I feel for Belén. But I force myself to deny her no matter how much it hurts. 

Our love is a sickness and both of us are infected. 

Because there’s no cure for being from the same family.


Mary: I think our decision to read this one went something like, “OMG actual incest romance, do we need?” “Fuck yassss”

Cleone: I was really sold when I opened the book and discovered it opened with a Pablo Neruda quote. Neruda is the patron saint of over dramatic, love sick, teen girls. I speak from experience, my jam was:

But I love your feet

only because they walked

upon the earth and upon

the wind and upon the waters,

until they found me.

Plus, ya know, incest.

M: Because we’re kind of weirdos like that. But this book actually turned out to be more of a Real Book and less of a Kink Book than I think either of us were expecting.

C: I cut my trash book teeth on incest stories. Maldeamores was kind of the perfect read for a really hot, humid summer day when your brain isn’t moving at full speed and you want to get lost in problems that are actually worse than your own (being in love with your cousin trumps anything I’ve got going on).

M: Belén (Bey) and Luciano (Lucky) are Dominican cousins, nine months apart, growing up in the Bronx. They’ve been there for each other for their whole lives, but when they hit their early teens, Bey starts nurturing quite a crush on her cousin Lucky. It’s pretty innocent at first – just wanting to be kissed by a boy, by Lucky, her best friend.

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Doubled, by Charlotte Stein

doubled

Grade: B-

Doing it at: 81%

Catnip: Hot  Twins; All in the Family; Threesome; Friends to Lovers; All Action No Plot

Shame Scale: It’s a book that’s essentially one long threesome sex scene. Surfing the high seas of shame.

Fantasy Cast: Nic and Campbell Pletts; Kat McPhee

What do we taste like: Peppermint

Book Description:

Bobbi has been friends with the Hoffman twins for one long, glorious year. They’re sweet, funny and kind, but there’s a problem…they’re also hotness personified. Times two. And when they lure her into a kinky little game involving a blindfold and some rather unexpected fondling, she finds them much harder to resist than she’d imagined.It seems they want to be something other than just good friends. They want a hot, steamy ménage, and all Bobbi has to do is decide if she’s up to the challenge. One big, gorgeous guy is enough for her.Two might be more than she can handle…

We ended up with Doubled in the library when Mary mentioned she might maybe want to read a book about hot twins having a threesome. Turns out, like most fantasy scenarios, there were A LOT of books to be had. Doubled is more of a novella in length and is mainly sex, extremely light on plot. I should clarify that that’s not a complaint.

Bobbi and twins Tobias and Sebastian have been platonic friends for awhile, a triumvirate of best friends who haven’t so much as kissed. Until a game to show Bobbi that she can’t ALWAYS tell them apart goes awry. Bobbi is blindfolded and feeling their faces all innocent like. Then feeling a bare chest, still pretty innocent. Then being eaten out, by which twin she is not entirely positive. See, Bobbi, don’t get smug – you can’t tell whose tongue is whose!

There is the barest wisp of a plot woven through in between the sex scenes. Bobbi has low self esteem and her roommate is a nasty piece of baggage, she asks Bobbi all the time why she hasn’t given the twins her number, because Bobbi doesn’t even know what to do with the double dose of sexy swimmers that she’s always hanging out with. Sebastian and Tobias are emo about no one being able to tell them apart and feeling like they have no identity as individuals. They’re just hot pieces of interchangeable ass to the other girls on campus. After the blindfolded, oral sex shenanigans they reveal to Bobbi that they had talked about doing something like that with her before, that they’ve been lusting after her for a long time.

“Remember that time we sat in on Broadman’s lecture and there were no seats left?”

“Yeah.”

“And you sat in my lap?”

“I don’t think I like where this is going.”

“I was hard then. I was hard during movie night, when you fell asleep against my arm. I got hard in the photo booth —”

“When we took those cute pictures? But I have nothing but wholesome memories of doing that!”

Sleeping with the same girl at once is not something they’ve ever done before but they both LOVE her and want to share her. Seb and Tobe want Bobbi to be their GIRLFRIEND. Their collective, shared girlfriend. Aw, guys.

Even though this book is 90% sex scene and only about 90 pages long, we don’t get our p’s in the v until 81%. Lots of oral for all parties before then, but no doing it until there is actual penetration is the Mybookshame rule. We take our review standards VERY seriously. This is a professional blog, y’all. Both twins are so big that Bobbi can hardly take them, natch, but their penises are very different. See! Even identical twins can have unique, giant penis shapes, they’re individuals. The twins are super in to the fact that they’re having sex with Bobbi at the same time, while absolutely not touching each other during sex. Because that would be weird. Seb and Tobe keep up a running dialog with each other while taking turns giving Bobbi a million perfect book orgasms:

“Oh God, I think she’s coming. Oh she’s almost definitely coming on my cock. Fuck fuck fuck.”

“She’s still doing it too. She’s still coming.”

“You serious?”

“Yeah, she’s….”

“God you’re right. She’s like a fucking fist around me.

Just brothers hanging out with brothers doing normal brother stuff.

This book is a real trash book. It has no pretensions of being anything else, and that’s probably why it was so fun. If you’re going to be a book about twin brothers sharing the same girl BE a book about twin brothers sharing the same girl. No one is reading that for the plot. Unless Franzen decides to cover this territory on his next release, then it’ll be art. If you’re looking for something light, mindless, and really fun that you can definitely not read in the same room as anyone you’re related to pick up Doubled.

Disclaimer/Spoiler under hot twins. Proceed with caution.

**Mary asked me to add a disclaimer that there is no DP in this book, if you are looking specifically for twin brother DP (which is cool, you like what you like!) keep searching. If we find it, we’ll be sure to let the world know. 

***Mary here – I wanted to add that this book gave us our second Mybookshame Rule. The rules are now as follows:

1. Doing it does not count until the P is in the V (Or the B, if there is no V)

2. Menage books should have DP. 

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Sated: A Dark Romance, by Charity Parkerson

Sated

Grade: C

Doing it at: 17%

Catnip: This Shit is Bananas; Threesome; Foursome; WTF; Rock Stars; Hot Cop; Multiple Timelines; Butt Stuff; Team Anal

Shame Scale: High, high shame.

Fantasy Cast: Just pick a hot band of guys and sandwich in a virginal blonde.

What do we taste like: Innocence. “Like ambrosia — sweet and citrusy”

What does he smell like: Spicy chocolate

Book Description:

(Dark Romance, F/M and M/M scenes, Rock Star Romance, Ménage, Sexy Detective, Alpha Male, Supernatural themes)

“Losing her mind wasn’t an experience she enjoyed.”

After a steamy night of passion with a dark stranger, Arbor’s life takes on a surreal edge. Disturbing dreams, lapses in memory, and entire buildings going missing are only a few of her problems. Her search for answers leads her to Detective Trey Murphy, the man in charge of investigating satanic and ritualistic crime for the New Orleans area.

Where do you turn when your mind is the enemy?

Meeting Trey only adds to Arbor’s confusion. By day, he keeps her captivated and gains her trust in a way no one else ever has. At night, Arbor’s every fantasy is brought to life by two sexy men who steal away her inhibitions. Torn between what her heart knows is real and what her eyes show her, Arbor must find the truth before she loses herself completely.

But, then again, sometimes reality is more twisted than any dream and love is the cruelest form of insanity.

**Author Note**

Warning: This isn’t your typical love story. It’s dark with scenes some may find disturbing. Sometimes love is senseless, and the heart is so very stupid.

We requested an ARC of this book, because: cover, description. I was assuming we’d get some bananas shit, because that guy in the middle looks like a zombie. But after reading, I think it was probably just bad graphic design that has him looking like a corpse compared to the fleshy stock photo models (and possible Jensen Ackles?) behind him. That’s not to say this book wasn’t bananas though. Because it definitely was.

This book switches back and forth between different perspectives and timelines. We open in a bar, while Killian watches Arbor reject the advances of Trey. He decides to approach her, and they have a hot, deja vu connection. Killian excuses himself to go join the band, because of course he’s in a band. He has tattooed on eyeliner and that sounds ridiculously unattractive to me, just saying. Some kind of fight or riot breaks out in the bar, and Killian and his hot bandmate Lyric (with tousled blonde hair, no eyeliner tattoos) escort her out of the bar through some kind of underground tunnel? None of this made any sense, and it’s never really explained.

Killian takes Arbor back to her apartment, and they pretty much immediately jump into some over-the-top analingus. It’s just that kind of book.

“Has anyone ever eaten your ass?” he asked, pushing up her shirt as he spoke. She didn’t respond. It didn’t matter. He already knew the answer.

….

“When my fingers are buried in your sex and my tongue is fucking your puckered strawberry, you’re going to feel fuller than you ever have before. But I promise you, it won’t be the last time.”

….

“Her arousal filled his lungs, feeding his darkest desires.”

For the record: points deducted for use of puckered strawberry.

Killian leaves afterwards, and the next day when Arbor goes back to the bar, all she finds a vacant lot. At this point the book gets pretty bat shit, switching back and forth between multiple timelines, points of view, buildings appearing, disappearing. Arbor starts seeing Trey, a detective, while also dating Killian and Lyric. She is having all sorts of flashbacks and dreams, while Killian and Lyric seem to know all about her.

There’s a twist, and it’s pretty easy to guess, but I’m not going to give it away. The plot went from bonkers to wrapped up in about a chapter, and I felt like the story itself could have been much more developed. And really, while there is a pretty decent original plot in this one, it’s more noteworthy for being one of the kinkier books I’ve read in awhile: Threesomes in a restaurant bathrooms with upright DP. Foursomes with some pretty fluid sexuality. Solid B level doing it, but the plot and writing needed work. If there was a sequel, I’d be curious enough to read it.

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Marly’s Choice, by Lora Leigh

Marly's choice

Grade: C+

Doing it at: 59%

Catnip: Mysterious Stalker; Girl You’ll Be A Woman Soon; Horses; Cowboys; Sexual Healing; All in the Family; Threesomes; Foursomes; Sweatpants Boners; Butt Stuff; #TeamAnal; Red Hot Burning Shame

Shame Scale: Red Hot Burning Shame

Fantasy Cast: Matt Dillon; Christina Ricci; Josh Hartnett x 2

What do we taste like: A well of cream that flowed like honey from her body

Book Description:

Book 1 in the series Men of August

Marly’s love for Cade has spanned her teenage years, and survived strong and intact into womanhood. Her fantasies and daydreams have sustained her, but she’s no longer content with merely imagining the touch of his hands, the taste of his kiss. It’s time to seduce the tough, sexy cowboy.
She’s heard the rumors for years, the tales of his sexual preferences. She’s prepared herself to accept his desires. Prepared her body for his touch. But she wasn’t prepared for the choice to come…

Cade’s dark desires, his sexual excesses are based in the past. In a time when pain, shame, and blood stains his very soul. He carries a secret shared only with his brothers. A secret that has scarred the bond, the ability to be a brother or to accept the love of the men he was raised with. He knows the only way to prove his loyalty, his love for those brothers and Marly will be the key.

She has a choice. She can surrender to Cade’s needs, his soul deep desires, or she can walk away. A choice only Marly can make. A choice that will change her life forever.

Reader Advisory: These stories have graphic sexual language and scenes – no closed bedroom doors (or other rooms) here!

Sometimes, you read a book that’s so amazing – so well written – that you need to pause for a while and digest the words. It’s almost hard to pick up another book afterwards, so I like to follow up really great books with really great trash books. Silly plot, lot of sex, nothing deep – unless we’re discussing penetration. This book was not the good one, it was the follow up. And it was perfect.

After a really disappointing book that I thought was going to involve a threesome with twin brothers that ended up being more of a thriller with one guy impersonating his dead brother (and had absolutely no double penetration whatsoever), I was lamenting to Cleone about the absolute dearth of threesome books involving twin brothers. I feel like it’s important to note that this isn’t a real life fantasy, it just seemed like something we’d see more of in the Shame Book world. My girl came through for me with Doubled, by Charlotte Stein, which with a few more clicks led me to Marly’s Choice, the first book in the Men of August series: three books about three brothers (two of whom are twins) and the ladies they share, and a fourth which appears to be a Christmas special. (Of course it is.) And at $10.49 a pop, I was thrilled to learn that my beloved local library has all of them. Giggity giggity.

Also, check out the cheesy cover of the paperback version. It looks like three copies of some old Scott Speedman doppleganger photoshopped together. Love

Marly's choice 2

Marly has returned home to the ranch for the funeral of the patriarch of the family who took her in as a teenager. When Marly was a young teenager, her mother realized that her stepfather was intent on molesting her, so she dropped her off with some family friends and disappeared to “draw him off.” The three boys in the family, Cade, and twins Sam and Brock, raised her as protective uncles. Now that Marly is all grown up (as a woman of twenty lol), she has set her sights on Cade, and is determined to seduce him.

Cade has been secretly lusting after Marly since she turned 18, but not a day before that – we wouldn’t want to go anywhere taboo with this plot! But as much as he wants her, he is determined to deny his feelings because he has some deep dark secrets, and is convinced that Marly would be disgusted with him and disappear forever if she ever found out what a horny beast he was. Marly starts coming on to him pretty strong, prancing around in thong bikinis and such, and poor Cade hasn’t “tested the wet heat of a woman’s desire” since Marly came of age. They have a few hot moments with kisses and touches, but Cade shuts everything down, telling Marly that it’s wrong, and a relationship between them will never happen:

“I fucking raised you Marly. I didn’t raise you to fuck you.”

And the dialog in this one is spectacular. The book basically starts out with Marly having a sex dream about Cade, including dream analingus, and it just goes up from there. There’s a plot with a dangerous stalker, but somehow almost every page manages to come back to something sex related. The adjectives and metaphors in this book were really some of the best trash reading I’ve read in a long time. It’s just endless dew of her need, arousal weeping from her body, well of cream that flowed like honey from her body, etc. And Cade pretty much walks around with a constant boner:

His erection was like a snarling beast beneath his jeans, demanding release, demanding Marly.

A groan was wrenched from his chest at the thought of taking her. Perspiration dotted his brow, and his erection was a torturous demon pulsing between his thighs.

So guys, I just want to be really spoilery and talk about this book in detail. I don’t think it ruins this particular book at all, but your call. If you think you might read this and want to avoid spoilers, scroll directly down from one hot guy to the next.

Matt Dillon

Ok. So this book is heavy on the butt stuff. Cade is definitely #TeamAnal, which Marly heard about from her friends’ older sisters growing up. She’s still a virgin, because she has been saving herself for Cade, but she’s been “preparing” herself to take the P in the B in anticipation of this eventuality. While Cade and Marly are making out, he tries to shock her by fingering her butt, and he’s surprised to see that she’s nuts for it. Cade gets mad and demands to know who taught her to take his fingers so easily up her butt. (I’m not making this up. It’s pretty much my favorite part of the book) When she confesses that she has been using dildos and plugs to ready herself for him, because she’d heard rumors about his preference, his resolve breaks and they fool around, but he stops shy of taking her virginity. They’re interrupted by drama involving the stalker – Cad find out that her evil step father has been stalking her, taking pictures of her for years and stocking up with a scary personal armory. Cade decides not to tell Marly that someone is after her, and that the best way to protect her is by sleeping with her and making her his. It’s shaky reasoning at best, but we let these things go in this sort of book.

Cade is still worried about sleeping with Marly though, because he knows his desire will make him lose control, and he doesn’t want her to run away when she finds out about his “dark, pulsating monster of need that made his flesh harden and ache.” Cade is worried that being with him will be too much for her, riding her for hours at a time. And then there’s also the tiny detail of the whole sharing her with his brothers thing.

They don’t completely explain *why* exactly the brothers have to share women, and frankly, it doesn’t really matter. There was some kind of horrible sexual abuse that he and his brothers suffered when they were younger, and while they don’t go into details, Cade figured out the only way to save his brothers was to have foursomes with them, I guess.

He couldn’t do anything but try to protect them, and show them in the only way he knew how, just how much they meant to him. By sharing Marly. And it was what he wanted, what he needed. An extension of his love for her, and his love for his brothers.

Every time they share a woman, it’s their way of reaffirming their love for each other. Whatever dude. I’m here to read about butt stuff and threesomes, I don’t really care about the backstory.

Cade and Marly finally get around to having sex, and it’s everything you’d hope for in a good erotica book. Literally so much pleasure, she passes out cold:

His cock plunged inside her, tearing past her hymen, sinking furiously to the hilt as the words left her mouth. Marly couldn’t breath for the pleasure. Her inner muscles gripped his pulsing flesh, stretching impossibly to accept him, protesting the intrusion with a bite of pain that nearly had her climaxing on the spot.

Unfortunately, Marly later overhears Cade talking with a guy they hired to help catch her stepfather, the stalker. He says something that makes her think that the only reason he slept with her was to get her to sleep in his room and keep her under his thumb so he can watch her easily. This leads to our manufactured break-up. Marly is mad that he lied to her – about her stepfather being after her, but mostly about the reason he slept with her. She thought he had finally realized he loved her the way she loved him, and she’s devastated to realize that it was to protect her.

Fast forward a few dozen pages and she’s over it, and Cade lets her in on his secret: the rumors she heard growing up were true, and she’s going to have to sleep with his hot twin brothers if she ever wants a relationship with them. So she does, in a scene that starts out with dual sweatpants boners, and ends with her in a threesome with Cade and his brother Sam. Both of whom have been recently shot, I might add.

Afterwards, Cade is all, “Baby, I love you, you did great. But there’s one more thing I need from you before we can make it official: you need to sleep with this other woman we have hanging around here to prove your dedication to us.” I guess it’s to prepare Marly for when Sam and Brock eventually bring girlfriends home, and she’ll be expected to participate? Marly decides to have a backbone though, because when they set up an orgy in the living room for her and give her the ultimatimum of fucking a woman she doesn’t really know, or leaving forever, she marches in and is like, “fuck you, fuck you, you can stay,” and then she has a foursome with all three brothers.

They catch the killer, then set us up for the next book by having Brock threaten some man into divorcing his wife, the woman we can only assume is the feature of the next book.

Josh Hartnett

As a book, the writing was over the top, and the stalker plot fairly predictable, but I’m bumping it up to C+ territory because I had so much fun reading it. This book gave me my personal best hashtags and I highlighted more than I’ve ever highlighted before. We’ve read a lot of books, good and bad, and I always love when something can surprise me with new words and phrases. This one had the notable distinction of being the first book I’ve read that used the phrase “female channel,” to distinguish the lady bits from the back bits:

His hand smoothed over her rear, hard and warm, his fingers running slowly down the crack, pausing at the tight pucker lower, then dipping quickly into the heated, slick crease of her female channel.

Also – Marly insists on sleeping in Cade’s shirts, and at one point there’s a bit about her wearing his silk dress shirt. This is a prime example of one of our favorite shame book phenomenons: An author describing something that should be sexy, but in reality looks like some awful 90’s gay club wear. Silk shirts are not even a little bit attractive, and I loved the visual of a big dark haired cowboy in a silk shirt that this book gave me:

Silk dress shirt

Seriously people, get this book, read it out loud a parties. You’re welcome.

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Revelry, by Carmen Jenner

reverlry

Grade: B-

Doing it at: 53%

Catnip: Rock Stars; Threesomes; Trouser Snakes; Circle Jerk; Down Under; Dual Narrative; Limo Sex; Elevator Sex; Love Triangle; #TeamAnal

Shame scale: I feel like I should be more ashamed of book this than I am, to be honest. You can certainly not lend this one to your dad, or your sweet old great Aunt, or walk into a church carrying it.

Fantasy casting: Adam Levine, Lauren Ambrose, Josh Mario John

Book Description:

Cooper Ryan is living the dream. Between the parties with rock royalty, booze, groupies and performing to crowds of thousands with his band Taint, life seems pretty sweet. There’s just one thing missing: the feisty little red-head that took his baby and ran off with his heart. Throwing himself into music is the only thing keeping him sane.

Until a run-in with a nonplussed, package-wielding PA throws everything off balance.

Ali Jones is having a craptastic life. Her grandmother died, leaving her homeless, penniless, and alone, and her boyfriend left her for a tramp who takes her clothes off for money. That’s why when she lands her dream job at a record company it seems like it’s too good to be true.

Because it is.

Slapped with an ultimatum, Ali must decide if facing the horror of the unemployment line is a fate worse than going on the road with four rowdy rockers hell-bent on making her life misery.

He’s adored by millions.
She’s not even loved by her cat.

Can they ignore their hatred long enough to survive the tour from hell? Or will their chemistry force everything to come crashing down around them?

Oh guys, this book. I started following Love Between the Sheets on Facebook, and those ladies are constantly posting books to tempt me even though our family library cup already runneth over. When Taint popped up I HAD to have it, rock star romances are a big catnip, as is hate into love, and tour buses (being on tour is kind of like being at summer camp, which is also hot). Taint gave me all the stuff I expected and about a million things I didn’t, in all the best ways.

Ali, who I’m a pretty big fan of, is not living her best life. She’s sleeping in her car, her ex boyfriend is an awful douche who moved a stripper into their apartment without asking and then started screwing her, and she has zero living family members. The only semi good thing she has going is that she landed a shitty job at a record company that she wants to parlay into her dream job of music management someday. Except she has the bad (?) luck of stumbling into a management meeting for the newly christened Taint (I KNOW), literally stumbling and landing on her knees in front of Cooper Ryan, the band’s lead singer. He’s nursing a fierce broken heart over an entirely different red-head and decides on a whim to add her to his negotiations. Ali tries to protest that this isn’t her job, not at all what she was hired for, and no way is she going to become the personal assistant to this band of assholes. She’s overruled and now she’s living in her car, showering at a local gym, AND being sexually harassed like its her job – which it kind of is.

Cooper has it hard for Ali, he’s not sure at first if it’s just because she reminds him of his ex, or if he likes her for her. But either way he wants to see if fucking her will get Ali AND his ex out of his system. Levi wants to sleep with her too, Levi of the infamous 12 inch cock (did we google 12 inch cock? Only we and our filthy shameful google search history know the answer to that), and the boys in the band arrange a bet to see who will sleep with Ali and when and where. These boys like their bets. Zed, the drummer who is like an overgrown puppy on speed, is ring leadering this and lets Alli stay with him until the tour leaves town. She sleeps on top. Of his bunk beds. Because he’s adorable and has bunk beds like Tom Hanks in Big — I’m scared drummers might really be my thing— and Ali isn’t having sex with ANYONE until the tour actually kicks off.

Here’s the deal, I really want to discuss this book in detail, but I also don’t want to ruin it for anyone who wants to read the book. So. I’m going to instruct anyone who wants to be surprised to scroll from one hot dude picture to the other hot dude picture and don’t read anything in between. Ok, ready?

levine

I felt like I needed a special trash book bingo card for this book. Mary is further into this Shame Book rabbit hole than I am, and has maybe popped a lot of her dirty book cherries already but Taint did a lot of my popping.

First: the circle jerk. That’s right, all the boys in the band decide to jerk off together, in to containers to see who releases the most…fluid. Ali is taking a nap in her bunk when they decide to do this, and wakes up to see the boys just going at it. And when they realize that she is watching things go a little awry and well… jizz everywhere.

Second: Cooper and Ali are starting to make some headway, even though both he and Levi are vying pretty hard to get that ass, Ali feels more of a connection to Cooper. Until he gets very very drunk and calls her by his ex’s name. So she flees. And ends up sleeping with Levi, which I was not expecting. We are already out way of any standard romance story lines here. And Levi really does have a 12 inch trouser snake:

I wrap the blanket around my body and hobble from the room – yes, you read that right – I hobble, because holy huge dick batman, I feel like I rode a stallion bareback halfway to fucking Texas

Third: Cooper isn’t happy that Levi bagged Ali before he did, but instead of getting mad in a traditional way he decides that to fix things he and Ali need to have sex WITH Levi. Surprise threesome! Bingo!

I could take one for the team – or two for the team – as the case may be.

We fell asleep in a puppy pile, our bodies a tangle of tired limbs.

I feel like Jenner put that puppy pile line in there just for me, good work, Miss.

And they continue to operate as a triumvirate (when I learned that word from Julius Caesar, I bet this is not how my English teacher envisioned me using it). On the tour bus, in the back of a limo, in an elevator that gets stuck between floors with no lights on. Elevator threesome! Bingo!

josh mario

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Spoilers over! Focus on the hot guy with the kitty and don’t look up.

Ali and Cooper have a unique set of problems to work through to get to their HEA, but I was happy to stick with them while they figured things out. I enjoyed the dialog in this one, Ali is funny and spunky and handles all the crazy that has become her life in ways that seem realistic –  that is when how completely unrealistic the book events are is taken into account. The sex is plentiful, varied, and hot. All points to the author on that front. It has been a while since a book surprised me so greatly and I sent so many messages to Mary and Paperback Purist with so many exclamation points. I’m recommending this one with the caveat that its dirty dirty, not just a little dirty, so be prepared. I’m also totally going back to read the author’s other books! She has me hooked.

Amazon